Struggling Through Divorce: 4 Tips For Helping Your Kids Understand The Process

Guest post contributed by Kara Masterson

Divorce isn’t just difficult for the married couple, it can be difficult for just about anyone involved. Friends, relatives, and children especially may find it harrowing to deal with a drastic life change like divorce. Kids are not as emotionally equipped to deal with a divorce as adults are. They may feel helpless about the situation or upset that they no longer spend as much time with one parent. To help your children through the divorce, here is some advice to keep in mind.

Pay Attention to Your Child

Because divorce can be a busy and tumultuous time, it’s easy for both parents to forget about the emotional wellbeing of their children. Pay attention to your kids during this time. If they are old enough, explain the situation to them as clearly as possible. Encourage the kids to express themselves in a healthy manner. Keep communication open with them.


Have Your Attorneys Create a Fair Arrangement

Finding an arrangement for the children may be the messiest part of the divorce. It’s easy for emotions to get involved during this process, as both parents typically feel entitled to spend time with their children. This is why it’s important to find experienced divorce lawyers who will help you through every step of the way. Attorneys like the ones at Begley Carlin & Mandio LLP are well versed in custody battles, child support and other issues that may arise with children of divorce. Find attorneys that are careful about maintaining relationships with clients, because divorce doesn’t just stop at the initial separation.


Be Open to Alternate Scheduling

There should also be a willingness for flexibility when it comes to the visitation schedule. Other life events aren’t always going to match up with visitation times, and that is where your divorced spouse can step in. It’s also a good idea to have a backup plan for times when neither parent is available.


Make the Transition Peaceful

For kids, it’s painful to watch the parents constantly fight. To make it easy for your children, develop a peace-keeping attitude. Communicate effectively with your ex, and be reasonable with them. If you can develop a friendship with your ex it can really help your child avoid a lot of conflict and confusion. This can also help prevent your kids from having a negative opinion of either parent.


Even though you want to protect your children from hurt, it’s important to accept that they will be saddened. It’s a natural response from them. Just remember that children are probably more resilient than we give them credit for and that they will cope with this.

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